Timing

Yo mateys!  What up?

So, I got a new doctor.  I'm pretty excited about it.  After my first appointment they knew more about me than my previous doc had in 4 appointments.  I scheduled a return appointment, they gave me some paperwork, and I was on my way.

Last night I was looking over the paper they gave me.  I noticed at the very end of the last page they had my weight and height listed... And THEN they had done the math to tell my by BMI.  Let's just say it was not a pretty number. 

WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND THINKS IT IS A GOOD IDEA TO TELL A WOMAN WHO IS 34 WEEKS PREGNANT THEIR BMI?????

I have gained 20 lbs this pregnancy.  My entire pregnancy with #1 I only gained 13 lbs and I had to work hard to get those 13 lbs.  Now, I'm not upset that I have gained 20 lbs.  I have worked hard to be healthy and make good choices, and we just had the fatty holiday season.

I know the BMI listed isn't really accurate but man, it is a bit of a kick in the pants.

So, to anyone who has connections reading this... If your office puts BMI's on patients forms that you send home with them, you should maybe find a way to get rid of it during pregnancy. 

That is all.

Anxiety, Diabetes, Pain, and Advice

Today Hod wanted #1 and I to meet him for lunch. We went to a little burger place and discovered #1 needed a diaper change. They didn't have any sort of changing station. Hod went to change her in the front seat of the car. As I waited for our food he called me in a panic. #1 had MAJOR diaper rash (she had been in the diaper for less than 25 min, I'm really not a major slacker. She had been fine then.) And she had managed to get urine all over the seat. She was actually getting blisters it was so bad. She doesn't have a dr yet so we went to the local urgent care. While there I was in some pretty intense pain. Not labor, but not right. The dr saw #1 and talked to me, telling me I needed to go to labor and delivery.

We called some friends to watch #1 for us and headed over to the hospital.  This is what we now know: I am borderline diabetic. After the three hour glucose test my Dr's nurse called me and told me I was fine. No other details, just "fine". Today I learned that if my numbers had been just one higher I would be listed as diabetic. I'm that close, and you couldn't tell me to limit my hot chocolate? No wonder I have felt so lousy.

Along with this I have "floating anxiety". Basically I am so stressed out that I am hurting myself. This is why I can't sleep and why I am in so much pain. It is bad enough that if I don't figure out how to change something I will have to be medicated or it could harm #2.  Oh, so you mean all the times I tried to talk to my dr about how I was feeling and he quickly told me "your baby has a normal heart beat, you're fine." He was actually wrong? Lame-o. I have been thinking of getting a new dr for a while, and today was the final straw!

After finding all of this out, I talked to the nurse in labor and delivery about doctors. She told me that in an emergency she would love to have my current dr, but if she wanted to be listened to, she would find someone else. So she gave us a recommendation. We asked for the phone number. She just had the dr come in and give it to us. I am very excited to try this new dr! Even just the 5 min we talked I felt like she has learned more about me than my current dr did in a month.  So glad to have a dr I can feel confidence in!

It's Alive!!

When I was about 16 weeks pregnant with #1, I was informed that I had an anterior placenta.  Not a big deal, it would just make it much harder to feel movement.  (There is some debate as to whether or not an anterior placenta more often leads to a posterior birth - which #1 had - but that is not the point of this.)  Seeing as it was my first pregnancy to go past 9 weeks, I had no idea what movement felt like anyway.  I didn't feel #1 until well after 20 weeks.  Then during the pregnancy, there was a time that I hadn't been able to feel her for way too long, so we went to the Dr, hooked me up to a machine, and I got to listen to her heartbeat for 30 min.  Well, 30 min on and off.  She kept wiggling, so it was hard to stay right on her heartbeat.  But wiggling was fine, we were just checking to make sure she was doing well, and wiggling was a great sign of that.  As a general rule, the only way Hod could feel #1 moving was when he would squish my stomach.  Basically we had to get her ticked off in order to feel movement from the outside.

Well, with #2, it couldn't be more different.  Around 11 weeks I thought I could feel her moving.  (I know, that is super early, but there was something moving around inside of me and it wasn't a normal feeling.  It was new.)  Hod has been able to feel her for a few months now.  She is a wiggler and a kicker!  Most of the time that is just fine with me.  It makes me giggle when I get a minute to sit down and read, and I rest the book on my tummy only to have #2 kick it off.  I have been amazed at how it feels when she kicks.  It is so different than with #1. 

Part of me thinks that #1 and #2 are already friends.  Well... maybe friends is the wrong word.  Every time I am sitting with #1 and #2 kicks, #1 gets a concerned look on her face and hits my stomach.  Then #2 kicks back and they go on for a bit.  I think this is how they communicate their plans for the night time.  They have this awesome schedule where every 45 min #2 will kick my bladder as hard as possible, thus waking me up and often making me run to the restroom.  Along with this, every 4 hours #1 is waking up and wanting to play.

This makes for a pretty tired Paily.  But it is a lot of fun feeling all of the kicking going on!

This and That

What is it about pregnancy that makes me SO klutzy?  I can totally understand running my ever growing stomach into things.  That is moving and changing every day.  But my elbows?  Same place they were 2 months ago.  Shins?  Haven't moved since I stopped growing.  The number of bruises on my appendages, is pretty intense.  And I never have a good story to go with them.  "Oh, that one?  That is where I hit the door frame cause I have no idea where my body is anymore."  Yeah, pretty lame.

In other news:  #1 has her first birthday on Saturday!  It was this Thursday last year that I was finally able to meet her.  What a sweet girl!  And I have been AMAZED how much she has changed in the past week.  She is so close to walking.  She is also just seeming much more mature.  It is like something just switched on in her comprehension center.  Now when I take her empty cup and tell her that I am going to give her more, she doesn't scream, she just looks at me excitedly.  It is quite wonderful.  She is also exploring the option of pushing boundries.  As bad as it is, it just makes me laugh when I tell her no, and she gets a big smile and moves to do it all again.  I'm having to work very hard on my serious face.  Her giggles may be cute, but we do need to learn here.  But it's so hard to be serious with that sweet smile and laugh!  She is also finally sleeping for longer stretches through the night.  I think with all of the craziness of our life she has had a really hard time.  This has been evident in her sleep.  It has not been uncommon for her to wake up every 2-3 hours.  That is way to often for a one year old.  But this past week she is normally waking up once around midnight and again around seven.  (Most people would count waking up at 7 as morning, but she is still tired and with a little coaxing will go back to sleep.)  Naps still leave something to be desired, but I blame that on all of the random people stopping by my apartment.  Seriously, friends.  You do not need to beat down my door.  And your knack for stopping by approximately 3 minutes after my daughter falls asleep would be laughable if it wasn't so darn inconvenient. 

Anyway, life is good.  But I better run.  #1 is chewing on the coffee table again.  "Dear, you aren't a beaver.  If you're hungry, I'm happy to get you some food!"

The Bucket Family Has Grown!

Hello friends!

Here I am, home from the hospital, after working hard to bring Bucket Baby #1 into the world!  And it was an intense process.

Often when I blog, I try to be witty or something.  But this time, I'm just gonna tell it like it is.  There will probably be some TMI, and I'm ok with this.  Because, this, my friends, is the true story of how #1 came into the world.  And it's a pretty long one.

Now, just some FYI, before I actually went into labor, I had been to Labor and Delivery 3 times.  Once the On Call Dr told us to go because he thought my water had broke.  Not true.  The next time my contractions were every 5 min apart and getting closer and harder.  But I wasn't progressing fast enough, nor was I full term, so they sent me home.  A few days later the same thing happened.  It was a bummer.

As of the last time I had gone to Labor and Delivery, I was dilated to 4 cm, and 80% effaced.  And I walked around like that for over a week.  Not so fun.  I kept wondering how I was going to know when I was in real labor, because my contractions were just what the Dr had told me they should be to go into Labor and Delivery.  But I always was sent home.  I just started to wish that my water would break so I could know for sure.  And I just needed something to happen.  I had been having painful contractions for 3 weeks.  Contractions that followed a pattern, got closer together, got harder, and then would stop after 5-6 hours.  Lame!

As you know from my last post, Tues night/ early Wed morning Hod and I went to Walmart.  Because of our late night excursions, I slept in a lot on Wed.  When I finally did get up, I ate some cereal, and was pretty much just lazy for a few hours.  Hod had gone to work, and I was just resting a bit.  Just before 1:00 PM I decided to get in the shower.  (Don't judge me, I woke up late.)  While in the shower I had a moment where I wondered if my water had broke.  Either that or I had lost all control of my urinary tract.  I climbed out of the shower, and had about 1/2 C of something suddenly come out of me.  But I knew if my water had "broke" it should be more than that.  Wondering if I had sprung a leak I quickly dressed and called my Dr.

Oh, but wait... they are all on lunch break till 1:30.  Lame!  I fought with myself for a bit wondering if I should just wait it out.  However, the repeat of excess liquid encouraged me to go.  I called Hod's cell phone... and heard it ring in the other room.  So, I called Hod's work phone... and it was busy.  I wasn't having contractions yet, so I grabbed my purse, and jumped in the car.  While driving myself to the hospital, I tried Hod's work number again.  Success!  Only he wasn't allowed to leave until another employee got there because of a company policy stating that they must always have 2 people at work.  But he only had half an hour of his shift left, so I told him it would be fine.  I got to the hospital and checked myself in.

Hod arrived about 10 min later.

Now, my Dr, who we shall just call Dr. K had told me that if I went into labor, he could augment it by breaking my water.  Because it was regular office hours I knew that he wouldn't be sending me home.  After running a few tests to make sure that my water had in fact sprung a leak, my nurse wasn't positive about it.  She went to call Dr. K but ran into him instead.  He told her that I had been sitting at a 4 for long enough and he would just come break my water.  I was SO excited!

Around 2:30 he broke my water.

About 60 min later they started me on Pitocin because I wasn't progressing at all.

And we waited.  And waited.  My contractions were consistent but not progressing me enough.  They kept getting harder and harder.  And it hurt!  Now, I know that some people are all about natural labor.  And that is fine for them.  I however, had no desire to go through all of that pain.  Yes, Labor is supposed to hurt, but I like modern medicine and wanted to take advantage of all of it's goodness.

Just after 5:30 Dr. S came to give me an epidural.  This was done with me sitting with my legs hanging over the edge of the bed, and my head on Hod's chest.  For not doing well with blood, Hod did a great job of being strong as long as I needed him.  And as soon as I didn't, he needed to sit in the chair.  But that's ok.

Right before I had my epidural, I had a grape Popsicle.  Yum!

Soon after my epidural, I lost my grape Popsicle.  Gross!

Watching me lose my Popsicle while I was in a lot of pain, was hard on Hod.  He left the room so he didn't join me in the losing of Popsicles, and when he came back I was in a Oxygen mask.  #1 didn't react so well to me throwing up.  This was even harder for Hod to watch so he called in back-up.  My dear Mom was on backup for us because I didn't want to deliver alone, and knowing Hod has a hard time with bodily fluids we invited her to join us.  She came for a while, and played cards with Hod.  I tried to get a little bit of sleep.  She stayed until just after 9:00 PM.  By now I had finally progressed to a 6.  Really?  I had been there for over 7 hours and had only progressed 2 cm?  Not cool.

The epidural was keeping me somewhat comfortable... well except for the top of my left leg.  It really hurt!  I don't know WHY that is where I was feeling all of my contractions, but it was, and I was not a fan.  Hod was doing better with everything, so Mom decided to go home and get some rest till the real action started.

Dr. K had predicted that I would deliver somewhere between 10:00 and Midnight.  This is because when I walked in the door, I was already half way there.  He was wrong.

Hod and I tried to sleep some... and couldn't.  The dang blood pressure cuff hated me.  It was checking me every 30 min.  And it never liked the answer it got.  So it would beep.  And beep until someone came to check it.

And #1's heart rate was a little bit off.

And I started getting a pretty high fever.  (By the end, it was up to 102)

FINALLY at 1:30 AM (only 12 hours later...) I was fully dilated and effaced.  They have a policy at my hospital that for first time Mom's if you have an epidural and get to this point, they give you one hour to just sleep and rest before the real action starts.  That way, your body can do a lot of work and you won't get so tired.

As the nurse checked me, she tried to see what way #1 was facing.  But she couldn't tell.

Hod and I tried to sleep, and failed some more.  Finally around 2:00 AM I called my Mom to tell her that the action was starting in 30 min.

I had another Popsicle.  (What I love them, and I was hungry and thirsty!)

2:30 we started pushing.

#1's heart rate was still being funky, so we started pushing on my side.  That helped her heart rate, but didn't help me progress.  But we pushed.  And pushed.  And pushed.  And I lost my other Popsicle.  Once again, lame! They normally don't let first time mom's push for more than 2 hours.  So that was my goal.  As I got tired, I watched the clock and knew I could go for that much longer.  We ended up putting me on my back again because baby's heart rate was just being scary.  I was also put on oxygen.  I hated that mask.  At this point, Hod was struggling with the fluids, so we called in another nurse, and he sat down to encourage me.

I also had really random but fun music playing in the background.  It was a good distraction for me.

At 4:30, Dr. K showed up.  Hod was holding my hand helping me along.  Mom was sitting in the background trying to help Hod be ok with things.  I was getting very tired, and #1 wasn't really getting all that close to coming.  When Dr. K showed up we had a serious chat.  He also couldn't tell what direction #1 was facing.  He just knew that things weren't quite working out.  Now, I have a few family members that cannot have a vaginal birth because of how their hips are.  Dr. K knew this about me.  And so it was a concern.  He asked me what I wanted.  I told him that I really didn't want a C-section but if that was the only option, then fine.  He asked how I felt about the vacuum suction cup thing.  I told him I was fine with it as long as it didn't put her too far down, and then she wouldn't fit and then we would have major problems.  He told me that within just a few seconds of pushing with the suction cup he would be able to tell.  Trusting him because he had been great so far (though all of his time estimates had been super far off) I told him to try it.

They hooked me all up to the vacuum thingy and I pushed.  He pulled... and it popped off.  Great.  "But," said he, "it helped so I think we'll be fine."

Dr. K also knew that I was anti forceps.  But we just still weren't quite going to make it.  But, instead of using the forceps to grab #1, he used them to help open up the birth canal.

And I pushed.  And pushed some more.  I was so done.  Between contractions I started crying and gasping for air.  My left leg hurt SO bad, and I was just tired.  I had only gotten around 5 hours of sleep the night before, and I had been in hard labor for over 10 hours.  I didn't know if I could do it.  People were very encouraging, but I just didn't know anymore.  Hod didn't know if I could do it, and he was crying too.  Mom later told me that Dr. K looked at her a few times, almost to ask her if I could make it.  But I didn't know what else to do, so I just kept trying.

Because of the epidural, I couldn't really feel that my body needed to push, so I had to force myself to do it.  I guess that's what you give up by deciding to go the less pain route.

Finally, at 5:06, after over 15 hours after checking myself into the hospital, and a full 2 1/2 hours of hard pushing, #1 came out.  All 7 lbs, 3 oz of her.  (Interesting fact, the song playing while she came out was the song I sang to Hod at our wedding.) She had been posterior.  That is why labor was so hard.  And long.  Because of my fever, and #1's funky heart rate, I didn't get to hold her right off.  That was sad.  I had just worked so hard to get her out, and Hod and my Mom were over playing with her while I sat there.  During this time, I found out that I had been tearing towards the front instead of the back.  So, to save me a lot of grief, Dr K had given me an episiotomy.  Along with that I had a bunch of little tears all around.  The stitching process took quite a while.  They cleaned up #1, ran a few tests, and decided she was well enough to stay with me for a bit.  I finally got to meet my baby!  And she was so sweet!  And poofy!  And had a crazy cone-head.  But she was mine!  And I didn't have to push anymore!

Unfortunately, because of my fever and her crazy heart rate, we had to drop her off at the NICU on our way to recovery.

And now friends, it is late.  We still have more of our story, but alas it is almost midnight.  I need to go to sleep so I can get up to go see my baby in the morning.  More to come!

It's Not a Myth!

Did you know that when Wal-Mart says they are open all night, it's true?  I had always wondered about that fact.  But this is what I learned:

1.  Walmart is surprisingly busy at 3 AM.

2.  They are in fact open.

3.  The lady who preps in the Subway inside of my Wal-Mart must be the SLOWEST prep-er ever.  Seriously. When I worked at Subway, and we opened at 10 AM the person opening showed up at 8.  However, the Wal-mart Subway opens at 7.  And she had bread coming out of the oven at 3:30.  I don't get it.

4.  I'm pretty sure the 3 AM cashier has seen everything.  Cause she didn't bat an eye when we showed up with a gallon of milk, some cold cereal, and a sweater so Baby won't freeze when we bring her home from the hospital.

5.  There are going to be a lot of people just "hanging" outside.  Personally I'd rather be in my bed, but I guess if you're that comfy when it's heck-a cold outside sitting outside of Walmart, then that's cool.

6.  There is no average age of 3 AM shopper.  Really, We saw early 20's, late 30's, early 50's, and older.

7.  I found that every person I saw I judged.  I just couldn't understand why they were there.  Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.

Oh, were you wondering why I was there?  Cause I woke up at 1 with regular contractions just painful enough to not let me sleep.  So I folded laundry.  But then Hod woke up, cause he can't sleep without me in the bed, and he was hungry.  He was going to eat some cold cereal, but then he would have used up all of the milk, and he was now wide awake, so we went to buy milk.

My contractions kept going till around 6, and then I was finally able to sleep.

OH, but here is a random.  I have no brain right now.  And yet, I woke up with lines from a poem that I memorized in 1998.  And it's not really a happy poem, it's about a little boy drowning in the sea.  I can apparently still recite 60% of it.  But don't ask me my own phone number.  That's not going to happen without real work.

What A Nice Place!

I have recently discovered a wonderful place in my city of residence.

You can go, and stay, and the workers there take care of you.  Often approaching you just to see if they can get you a glass of water.  You have your own bed, and a couch in your room.  There is free cable TV, and your own personal bathroom.  This room also comes equipped with a personal phone, free snacks for visitors, all you can eat Popsicles, multiple light settings, and a fancy yoga ball to bounce on to your heart's content. Oh, and they have large windows giving you a great view of the city.  Doesn't this sound like a place you want to go?

Well, there is one catch.

You have to be in labor.  Oh, and progressing.

Just early labor and slow progression isn't enough.  They'll kick you out for that.

How do I know this?  Cause I have been there TWICE in the past 3 weeks.  They are very nice, and each time I am told... "Yeah, you have regular contractions 3-5 minutes apart... but... uh... we're not sure why you're not progressing, so we'll send you home."

Baby keeps toying with me.  She's all "Hey, Mom, I'm gonna come visit!"  Then after 5 hours of regular painful contractions she decides, "Actually, this is kind of warm and comfy... maybe I'll stay here a bit longer."

Well, Baby, I'm at 37 weeks.  That means FULL TERM.  There is no reason to be an over achiever and aim for a full 40 weeks.  37 will do.  In fact, I think 37 weeks and 1 day is the perfect time to be born.  Ready, Set, GO!

I need to be in that nice, fancy room again. :)

Maybe That Should Have Been A Secret

Hey Yo's.

Still pregnant.  (Oh, and Laree a note to you, my Dr. moved my due date up a week, cause baby is measuring big, so I'm not quite as early as things seem.  I updated my ticker to show this.)

Every time I take a deep breath, or have a look of concern, Hod is sure I'm in labor.

My contractions are still pretty regular and getting more painful.  But I don't think I'm to the "Next Level Of Pain" I was told I had to be at to go to the hospital.

Baby needs to make up her mind.  This whole, "yeah, I'm going to come so you'll have regular kind of painful contractions for 3 hours, and then when they just start to really hurt, you'll only have one, and then I'll stop" thing totally bugs.  So, now we are disciplining our child for not making up her mind.  This involves 3 things:

1- Often now when Hod gets home from work, he puts baby in time out.  This entails giving me a kiss but ignoring baby for about 10 minutes.  I don't think she notices.

2- After a contraction she tends to kick hard as if to say, "Hey, you're squishing me!  Stop it!"  I have no sympathy.  I normally respond by telling her, "If you'd just come out, you'd have lots more room."

3- We are now calling her Eunice.  Not to offend anyone who may have a loved one by that name, but I don't like it.  We call her Eunice and tell her that when she comes out she can get a pretty name.  But until then, it's Eunice.

Now, I know that I'm still early.  I need to get over it.  I was really doing fine and planning on something close to the end of October/early November.  Then the Dr told me I could go into labor in the next 24 hours.  And I didn't.  Part of me says, "Oh good, baby has more time to cook, and she'll be healthier."  The other part of me says, "I was told that I could be done feeling fat, tired, and sick.  WHY is this still going on!"

Being told that the end is here, and then the end not coming is a total bummer.  Well... unless we were talking about the end of the world, and you had an awesome date with your hubby planned for the day after the world was ending, and then the world didn't end, so you could still go on your awesome date.  That would not be a bummer.

It's strange being a ticking time bomb.  I'm just sitting here waiting for my body to start putting me in extreme pain.  Wow... that sounds hopeful.

But the end will come!  And baby will come!  And she'll get a prettier name than Eunice.  Until then, we keep going!

Baby Update!

Alright, Peeps.  Here's the story. (And because it's about baby, that means it's about my body, so you have been warned of any potential TMI)

Last night as I went to get ready for bed, there was something... different happening down under.  We called the OBGYN on call, and told him what was happening.  His guess was that my water had broke, so he told us to go to labor and delivery.  We went, got all hooked up to the monitors, they checked everything under the sun, and at 3:30 AM, with my contractions 3 minutes apart, they sent me home.  Hod and I were SO tired!

This morning I had an appointment with my Dr.  He told me that the different occurrence down under was probably me losing my mucus plug.  And with what he described, I agree.  However, apparently this is uncommon for first time moms to experience like I did.

After being checked for the 3rd time in 11 hours (And no one ever told me how much it hurts!) we discovered that in 6 hours I went from being a 1 to a 1+, and from being not really at all effaced to being 70% effaced, and from baby being where ever to being at a Zero.  Looks like my contractions are actually doing something.

Dr's prediction is that I will deliver in the next 24 hours, or in 2 weeks, or anytime in between.

And as for me: as soon as we are done with Hod's Dr appointment I'm taking a nap!

Toodles!

I'm In Love

It's true.  I'm in love.  I love Hod.  AND I love this little friend:

Introducing, in her world-wide debut...... Baby Bucket!

Baby Bucket comes to you all the way from my uterus.  She enjoys sleeping, doing cartwheels, getting the hic-ups, and kicking me in the ribs.  She is currently weighing in at 4 lbs, 14 oz (give or take 1/2 lb for error) and is expected to join our family sometime near the beginning of November.

Hod and I got a bonus ultrasound, because I haven't been able to gain weight.  Today I ate a HUGE breakfast trying to get my weight up.  As of today, I have gained a total of 7 lbs.  That's not a lot when baby weighs almost 5.  But she is doing great, so the Dr is no longer concerned.

And I am perfectly enamored with this sweet little girl.

(Sorry it's not a great picture, I was too lazy to scan it, so I just took a picture of the picture with my phone.)

The Best Invention EVER!

I've tried pretty hard to not be a super needy pregnant lady.  There are SO many things out there for ladies "with child" and I feel I've done a decent job of going without.  Honestly, half of the inventions are lame.  There are some things, like maternity cloths, that just weren't optional.  Hod also splurged once and bought me some of the best lotion ever.  Seriously, it's so smooth, and soft, and smells good, and isn't oily, and makes it so my ever growing body doesn't itch.  However, I learned that if you leave it in your car for 5 hours, and it gets hot, then it turns into putty and is no longer usable.  Luckily, the lady at the store likes us, so when I mentioned it, she offered to exchange it.  Yes!

Anyway, this post was not meant to be about my lotion.  (But it really is amazing.)  For the past month, I have found that by morning I am excited to get out of bed.  Not because I'm rested, but because my hips hurt so dang bad!  Most days I would limp around for about an hour and then it would stop hurting.  I tried to be positive about it, I mean, you're just supposed to be in a lot of pain when you're pregnant, right?  But it just got too bad.  When I spent an entire day limping, and wincing with every step I took, I decided it was time to do something.

Hod came home from work, and I told him, we were going to the store.  I had needs, and I was done sucking it up.  We came home with this:

Only mine is much cuter, cause it has a "reversible" pillow case.  (It's not really reversible, as they so willingly advertised.  The fabric on the front is different than the fabric on the back.  If that's really reversible, then I'm a monkey.)

I am amazed at the difference a body pillow can make!  Most maternity pillows are super expensive, but this wasn't.  And now I can sleep!  And some mornings I even wake up feeling rested!  It is the best invention ever!  I love it!  So, today is celebrate the greatness that is a body pillow.  Go ahead, party your own way, but just party.  Because this has changed my life!

I'm Roughly The Size Of A Barge!

Hod's two sisters are quite slim and trim.  I remember right before his sister K delivered her son, Hod commented on how large she was.  She was quite proud of her size.  It made me giggle.  For her, YES, she was very pregnant looking.  For my family, she looked like she was about 4 months along.  Hod said he couldn't wait to see me look like that.  I commented back that he, "ain't seen nothin yet."

I started out much larger than K.  And I have grown.  Despite the fact that I am not gaining weight, I am ginormous!  Let me show you how large I am.  (please ignore the out-of-proportion-ness of my hand.  I haven't yet figured out how to take a good self portrait.)

This is me almost a week ago.  Hod LOVES it.  And that's good, cause I'm not loving it so much.  Having struggled my entire life with being ok with my size... this is a little hard.  But at least I look pregnant.  No one would look at me now and think, "Wow, that lady is super squishy!"  Well, they wouldn't unless they are very uneducated on pregnancy.

Being short, I feel that I waddle like unto an Oompa Looma.  However, my skin is a much more delightful color.

The good news: I have less than 100 days left!  I am so excited to meet my dear sweet little girl!

That Was A Strange One

Last night, Hod and I were visiting some friends, and I started having an allergic reaction.  I discovered my first food allergy in 2003, and I'm quite aware of my body when it comes to food and possible reactions.  Did you know you can have an allergic reaction to something you ate 72 hours before?  After much contemplation, I realized that the only unusual thing (Or I can have a reaction when I eat a large quantity of a food... but I hadn't done that) that had entered my body were some crackers I got from a lady in my ward.  She is allergic to everything.  OK, not everything, just gluten, milk, and I think something else.

Apparently I'm allergic to crackers made for the highly allergic.  Strange.

Anyway, while at my friend's house, I broke out in hives.  My doctor has told me that once I see hives, I have one hour to get some sort of fast acting allergy medicine in me (think Benadryl or something like that) before my face starts swelling up and I stop breathing.  Luckily my friend runs a pharmacy out of her house (not for real life, she just has a little bit of everything) and she hooked me up.

Benadryl always gives me really strange dreams.  I hate having drug induced sleep.  It does crazy things.  Let me share this dream with you.

In my dream, I was waking up at my Mom's house.  My sister L6 was there (which is funny, cause she's been staying with my Mom for almost 2 weeks now.)  I was kind of delirious in my half awake state (remember that in real life I was still dreaming) and realized that my stomach had shrunk and I couldn't feel anything inside of my anymore.  With panic I turned to my Mom and asked, "Where is my baby?!?!"  My Mom laughed at me and told me that I had delivered a few hours earlier.  I was so exhausted that as soon as the baby was out of me, I passed out.  Mom took me into her bedroom to meet my little child.  She was pretty darn cute!  I picked her up, excited to meet her, and she had the floppy-est head in the world.  Despite the fact that her neck looked a normal length for a newborn, her head moved like it was sitting on a 2 foot long piece of cooked spaghetti.  Upon further inspection, I also discovered that she had 5 piercings in each ear.  I had apparently given birth to a punk rocker.

As I looked at baby, I was considering all of the names that Hod and I are wondering about, and nothing felt right.  Even after meeting her, I still didn't have a clue what to name my baby.  Then I realized that Hod was missing.  I found him passed out on the floor of my Mom's family room.  L6 had been keeping an eye on him. I guess during my delivery the blood was too much, so he had passed out.  Then I got the story of how baby had come.

I had been sitting at the table, when I just kept moaning like something was wrong.  L6 finally realized that I was in labor (yeah, right... cause all I would be doing is moaning a little) and decided she should check my progress.  (Also strange, as L6 doesn't have medical training, and this is my first baby, so you'd think they'd just tell me to go to the hospital where I am planning on delivering.)  Turns out baby was already crowning, so L6 decided to play Dr and help get the baby here.  Everything went really fast, and baby came out looking great.  This is when I passed out.  Somehow, my unconscious body got everything else out of me, they cleaned up, and let me sleep.  The entire delivery lasted under 20 minutes.

I was kind of freaking out at this point, and I was sure I needed to go to the hospital.  Really, I had just delivered at 25 weeks, and baby was perfectly fine.  That didn't add up in my brain.  So, we threw some water on Hod to wake him up.  He was too shaken to drive, so he called a taxi service.  While waiting for the taxi, baby got hungry, so we decided to try nursing.  Of course, that worked perfectly on the first try, and even though I had delivered about an hour before, I had milk.  Also strange.  Hod wanted to burp baby, so I let him.  Oh, here's a random fact, Hod was sporting long hair that would put Fabio to shame.  It wasn't a good look for him.  Baby spit up in Hod's hair, and he FREAKED out.  Apparently he was very attached to his hair.

The taxi came, but the chick was in a hurry, and wouldn't let us put our car seat in her taxi.  I was trying to put it in anyway, but she just wouldn't let me.  I remember banging on the windows and shouting, "But the hospital won't let me take my baby home without a car seat!"  Halfway to our destination, Taxi Driver Lady had Hod sign some paperwork, where we discovered that this 4 mile trip was going to cost us $173.  I expressed some concern, and she decided to give us a deal, because she used to be one of my sister's (L7's) band students.  But her life had gone downhill.  She then played a song that told us her life story.  It was a pretty great song, that doesn't exist in real life.  It was all very dramatic.

Anyway, we got to the hospital, and no one would really talk to us, because everything looked fine.  When I cornered a Dr and explained that I had just delivered at 25 weeks, he just looked at me and said, "So, what's the big deal?"

In the end, Hod and I decided to just go home.  A car (with a car seat) magically appeared.  During the drive home, I woke up.  As in, back to real life, I'm awake now.

Baby is still inside of me, right where she belongs.  That was a really strange dream.  I'm not sure what to make of it.

I really don't like drug induced sleep.

Losing Brain Cells

I can't even tell you how glad I am that Hod got a new job.  Because I NEED him!

Pregnancy brain is such a real thing in my life.  Because Hod has been working at least 60 hours a week, I have been taking care of everything in our apartment.  And that's fine, because I've only been working around 10 hours a week.

However, it seems I have given all of my current brain cells to baby girl.  Let me give you some examples.

I did a load of whites, and they came out smelling gross.  I had been a little slow getting them from the washer to the dryer, so I blamed it on that.  But it really wasn't that long!  However, we have one of those high efficiency washers, so maybe I just needed to clean it?  I don't know.  Because we have a top loader, it's not supposed to get gross very fast, like I was told I should clean it 3-4 times a year.  And we only have had our washer for a month.

We couldn't figure out what it was.  Then, while Hod was changing cloths, he realized that his shirt smelled like a mix of Jolly Ranchers (remember this?) and of him.  But I was no where to be found.  Do you see where this is going?  I forgot to put laundry soap in the washer!  I have been doing my own laundry for SEVENTEEN years, and I have never forgot soap!  Who does that?  Pregnant ladies.

I've been demoted, so now it's Hod's job to wash and dry the laundry and I just put it away.

Along with this... I tried to burn down the apartment.  Ok... not on purpose, but still.  Here's that story.

I have this super fancy hair straightener, that I got from a friend in TX.  But the power button is crazy sensitive.  I've had this straightener for 3 years, and I just learned early on to always put the power button towards the counter.  Then I couldn't accidentally turn it on.  For 3 years I've been doing this.  And yet, on Sunday, I forgot.  Monday, when I went to go get in the shower I tossed my clean cloths on the counter.  After my shower, I reached for my cloths, and they were all hot!  My pants (and I only have 2 pairs of maternity pants) were burned.  It's not horrible, the average person probably wouldn't notice, but still, I burned my pants!  If I had taken a longer shower, I would have started a fire and burned down my apartment!

Because there was no real harm in this, I can laugh a bit about it, but it is still a bummer!

Our Goings On

Oh life.  How you keep trucking on.  Because I think that I'm interesting enough that you all want to know the every day stuff in my life, I thought I'd fill you all in. :)

I am working part time at an Ice Cream manufacturing plant.  I work 2 days a week, for the most part.  The other secretary is a long time friend, and I pick up shifts for her when she needs a day off for one reason or another.  And it's a blessing.  My job ends around Labor Day, but if/when my friend needs a day off she'll still call me!  So that's cool.  For the next year I am quite likely going to have some random income at random times. Oh, and even after baby girl is born they will let me take her to work.  Pretty much the perfect situation?  I think so!

Hod is a working machine!  Because we don't want me to work after baby is born... well except for a random day here and there, Hod has been working 2 jobs to make enough money to support us.  Between the 2 jobs, he is at work for around 70 hours a week.  Yeah, sure, he's clocked out for breaks for part of that, but he's not home.  It's been rough.  I miss my hubby!  But then, something exciting happened!

Hod applied for a manager job with a different company a few months ago.  This would be a training job, where they teach you how to be a head manager, train you for a year, and then move you to some random part of the country where you are in charge of your own store.  During his first interview he was told that he would be given a call for a second interview in about a week.  After a week, we heard nothing.  This company e-mails you to give you the bad news, and we didn't get the e-mail either.  We waited, and waited, and Hod applied for other jobs, and we waited a bit more.  Then almost 2 weeks ago, Hod was called in for a second interview.  We were shocked!  We had given up on this job.  He went to the interview, felt it went well, and was told that he should hear back by Wednesday if he got the job.

During all of this, he has been miserable working his full time job.  It is not a good job.  It is lousy, and they are not nice people.  He had given up hope of ever getting out of there.  While I am so grateful that he is willing to work a lousy job to support us, it has been hard watching him be so miserable.

Wednesday came and went.  No call, no e-mail.  Then Thursday, while we were on our way to go see Hod's sister he got a call!  He was offered a job.  Not quite the job he had applied for.  We are a little bit nervous.  This current job is a little bit special.  It doesn't make quite enough to support us.  However, it is kind of a 30 day audition.  Because Hod has never worked for this company (which has some commission type stuff, which Hod has never done) they want to make sure he's the right fit for the manager training job.  Hod is pretty amazing, so we're not super stressed about him not passing the audition.  But if he doesn't, then life is going to be really hard once I stop working in September.  But when he does, he'll be salaried!  SALARIED!  We don't have to stress every time he needs a day off because that includes a pay cut.  AND he'll be back to working only 40 hours a week.  I get my husband back!

Baby is doing great!  She is measuring right on schedule.  Both ultrasounds she has been super active, but then again... I drank some juice so she was probably on a sugar high.  Everything with my pregnancy is looking good.  I have this random infection that you are either born with or not, so I'm on an antibiotic.  It's not a big deal, but if it is left untreated it can cause pre-term labor.  I take a pill twice a day, and it's all good!  I have an anterior placenta, meaning it will still be a while before I can feel regular movement.  This is also not a big deal at all, unless I need a c-section.  Then it can cause complications, but not really, because you're already in surgery, so any complications would be somewhat expected and they will be able to fix them all.

Hod and I are very excited to have Baby here!  And now it's fun that we can start getting the nursery ready.

Overall, life is going great!  We are happy and life is only getting better!

Did You Notice The Change?

Hey, friends!  Just a quick update.

Did you notice my ticker change?  It has multiple changes.  We are now comparing baby to various food items.  Also, my due date has been moved forward!  Yep, I gained almost a week.  I feel really good about that option.  And the last change is... IT'S PINK!  As in, Hod and I are having a little girl.

I'm pretty happy!  I originally wanted a boy first, but when we found out that she is a girl, I wasn't disappointed at all.  This is going to be great!

It Makes Me Hungry!

This post may have a little TMI.  Just go with it.  It's nothing that bad.

When I was a young teen, I had the unfortunate-ness of having ... shall we say more potent sweat than the average girl.  For years, I used this super expensive deodorant that fixed the smell, but had no antiperspirant.  It was no fun.  

While I was in college, someone I knew with a similar problem went to a dermatologist and was told to use Arrid Gel Extra, Extra something like that.  I joined the ranks and was in LOVE!  Finally a deodorant with antiperspirant.  The only problem: it was mostly for men. Most scents made me feel like a man.  I had exactly one option that made me feel girly.  But I was happy.

Then they took away one of the Extras.  It seemed to be pretty much the same thing... so I kept going.

Then they got rid of the only Extra left.  This was becoming problematic.

Then they stopped selling the one girly scent in stores, but I could find it online.

Alas, it is no more.

So, I decided I would have to just smell like a man.  It was better than smelling gross!

My trip to the store was very disappointing.  They didn't have ANY Arrid at all!   What was I to do?  However, in my many years of Arrid use, most of the other brands have come out with "prescription strength" options.  Looks like I better try one of those.  I found a powder fresh option, cause that's my fav, and went home to try it.

And it works!  I'm quite happy.  However, there is one thing..... it makes me smell like Jolly Ranchers.  Watermelon Jolly Ranchers to be exact.  I thought I was crazy, so I asked Hod, and he totally agrees.  Now I walk around smelling like candy.  Do you have any idea how susceptible a pregnant woman's cravings are to suggestions?  I've even started dreaming about Jolly Ranchers.

I don't think deodorant is supposed to make you hungry. 

I Don't Think That is What They Meant

As many of you know, it is a common thing for pregnant woman to be slightly unaware of their bodies.  They used to fit through a spot *this* big, and now they need a spot *TTTTHHHHIIIISSSSS* big.  Because this happens so quickly, we tend to be a bit klutzy as we adjust to our every changing bodies.

I haven't had too much of a problem so far.  Then today I had a crazy klutzy moment that hurt!  But not what you think.

My pierced ears have become quite sensitive since becoming pregnant.  As a result, I need to normally wear my very high quality earrings.  These tend to be quite expensive, so I only own one pair; my studs.  I put them in, and forget about them, wearing them for weeks at a time.

This morning as I was combing my hair, I caught my earring and ripped it out of my ear with my comb.  I've had my ears pierced for a year, and I've NEVER done something like that.

I would like to blame it on my ever changing body that I can't keep track of... but I'm pretty sure pregnancy hasn't changed the placement of my ears.

What's With The Pitiful Face?

Good-Golly-Hormones, Batman!

I've heard that there are crazy hormones that go with the pregnancy.  I've been a bit more ... volatile since becoming pregnant.  I've been feeling extremes.  However, there has been a pretty intense lack of tears.  I've never been a crier.  According to my sisters, I'm the heartless one in the family.  This week I have proved them wrong.

This week I've cried about 10 times.  Some of it was real, and for good reason: like hitting the due date thing.  Most of it was pointless: like running out of salt in the salt shaker.  (Don't you worry, there was more in the cupboard.)  The only somewhat redeeming part has been that Hod is working so much to provide for us, that he hasn't had to witness the majority of these breakdowns.  I'm really hoping that this is a temporary thing.  I'm sure it will happen again, but I am really hoping that this will stop for a while.  Cause if I cry twice a day for the next 20 weeks, I'm going to be really bugged.

Life Goes On

Today, at work, when I finally figured out what day it was, I had this little bell go off in the back of my mind.  I worried that I was supposed to do something today, and I had forgotten.  But, I was at work, so I just pushed that to the side.

Around 7:00 this evening, I remembered.

Today was supposed to be my due date.

Part of me says that's totally fine, because I'm pregnant now.  As far as I know, everything is great with this baby.  I'm so glad that I have this today, so I'm not as sad.

The other part of me says that I'm a jerk for forgetting.  How could one forget her own child?  I feel like a bad mom for forgetting about my angel baby.

For those of you who don't remember, I actually miscarried for about a month before we knew for sure.  I bled for a month before we had an ultrasound.  There I was able to see my baby's heartbeat.  But it was slow.  The Dr. suggested we wait a week to see if things would be ok, and then make a decision.  The next week the heartbeat was gone, and I went into surgery the next day.  Because I had been bleeding for so long, and because there was a large mystery spot on the ultrasound, the Dr. wonders if I miscarried twins.  Just that I had miscarried one so much earlier that almost all signs of that baby were gone.  It's hard not knowing for sure.

A few days before the first ultrasound, I was very worried.  Part of me knew something was wrong.  Hod didn't believe me.  I'm not sure if that is just because he didn't want to, or if it was because he just thought I was paranoid.  Either way, he bought me a gift to make me feel better.  We are big fans of the Willow Tree figurines.  Hod gave me this:

It's called "Cherish"

It really means a lot to me.  This is the one way I was able to hold my baby.  To my knowledge, in this life at least, this is the only way I will ever hold my baby.  Though that was one of the hardest things I had ever gone through, I will always cherish that pregnancy.  I learned a lot from it.  It helped Hod and I to communicate better.

I've heard a lot of things about what happens when a woman miscarries, and what happens to that child.  I don't doubt at all the revelation some friends have received when they have gone through it.  However, I have not received any of the same.  So, I just don't know.

But life goes on.  I'm pregnant again.  I am positive that this baby is not the child I miscarried.  Right now, I am the mother of 2 (or maybe 3) children.  I pray every day that in 2 weeks when I have my next ultrasound that everything will be great.  I saw this baby's heartbeat at 7 weeks, and everything looked good.  I hope it still is.  

I guess it really is ok to go days at a time without thinking about my first baby.  But I will always love that child.  And I am grateful to have another baby coming, so I could spend the day working, and being happy and productive.  I will always cherish the short time I had with my first.  However, I am excited for the time I have had, and will have with my second.