Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Does She Have a Mute Button?

I'm in a choir. It's pretty big. Not big as in, we are super famous and everyone wants to be us. More big as in, there are a lot of warm bodies singing. Sunday we have a concert, and one of the songs we are singing has a solo. Tonight, right after rehearsal, they were holding auditions for said solo. I'm in this choir with L5 and we were debating on auditioning or not. Let's be honest, I really wanted to audition, but I'm a total chicken. But I told her if she did it, I would. I spent the entire 90 minute rehearsal prepping myself for the audition. Little internal pep talks and all that. Then L5 remembered an important fact: we may not be at the concert. Our parents are getting set apart for their next mission that night, and we don't know what time that is going to be at. Right at the end of rehearsal, L5 decided we shouldn't audition, so we got ready to go home. But we needed to tell our director that we may not be at the concert. We stop to tell him and he tells us to audition anyway. As soon as L5 said we weren't auditioning, all of my pep talks were thrown out the window. WHAT? You want me to do what? Now? No prepping? AHHHH!

We sit, and wait our turn, and I'm going to go first. Lots of people are going, and they sound good and I'm just sitting there and my throat is getting drier and drier, and I'm totally freaking out, and I keep eying the door, but my turn is getting closer and closer. I notice that the podium is not down as far as it goes. Only being 5'2", I decide that I will lower the podium the rest of the way and go. As I walk towards the podium, I reach down to move it... and it doesn't move. It's as low as it goes. That means I'm going to look like a 5 year old with my hands up to my chest standing on my tip-toes to see over the podium. This is where the normal freak out Paily comes out. This is what happens: Everyone looks at me funny cause I tried to move the podium. So I have to explain it. Then I see a little stool for the short kids, and I ask if I can use it. At this point I am talking as quickly as possible and not breathing, and my mouth is as dry as if I had been sucking on saltine crackers for the last 3 hours. A nice guy gets the stool for me, and I'm giggling cause I'm nervous. I stand up on my little stool and explain my shortness again, and say my name. One man asks for clarification on my last name and I say it again. Then I go off on how it's Danish... or is it Swedish... Well it used to be this, but then it got changed, but this is how you spell it, cause my great-great grandfather (insert a few more greats) was from one place and I should have just pulled out my 4 generation pedigree chart. Do they care? Nope. Not really. Then I'm sure to inform them that I'm cute... cause that has to do with anything.... I sang. It was fun. I made some people smile. There is no way in anything that I will get it. I feel good about that option. But really... Why do I talk so much, so fast. These are nice men. They were just smiling and laughing. If I were them, I would have been searching for that crazy girl's mute button. Seriously.

So that's my story. I totally freaked out. Ha ha. I'm sure I'll laugh more about it later. But for any of you that know me, just picture me in standard freak out stage. Yep. It was pretty cool. Someday maybe you can be as cool, calm and collected as I am. Keep trying. You'll get there. :P

(You will notice this is run on and crazy. I'm not editing it to make it different. It will give you a hint of how I really felt. Scary, eh?)

And, also, on a completely unrelated note... If you have a headache, and go for a ride in my car, I have 16 ibuprofen floating around. Just let me know how many you use so I can know what I have left. :)


Laura said...

he he he... I can so totally picture your entire experience. You have quite the way with words, thanks for the entertainment!

Laree said...

ooh, sorry babes! Not the most enjoyable experance to have, but one of the funniest to read!