Judge If You Must

A few weeks ago, #1 stopped eating.  Before that, she was just barely eating the minimum recommended amount for her weight. This worried me.  Especially since we had just taken her off the extra calorie formula.  She has been growing ok, but she can't keep her pants up.  Though, that could be because she's super tall.  (Just barely 4 months, but she's been in 6 month clothes for a while.  Because she is so long, people in stores stop me to tell me that she's too skinny.)  And then she stopped eating.

I did some research, and found out lots of babies have this problem at this age for a few reasons.  Often, this means that the babe is ready for the next flow of bottle nipples.  This kind of surprised me, cause #1 was already on a higher flow than normal.  So we tried it.  And it didn't really help.  It could also be teething.  But she still has to eat!

Then I found another suggestion: sometimes this is a sign that baby may be ready for solids.  WHAT? She wasn't even 4 months.  Yes, she was showing a lot of signs that she could be ready, but what about 6 months?  Ok, I wasn't sure we had to wait that long, but I didn't want to rush things.

Out of other options I decided to try it.  And it looked something like this:  

(Dude! What is this stuff on my face?)

But, after eating the little bit she did, she was willing to eat more of her bottle.  

The next day, we tried it again, only a little thicker, and she ate even more.  And again the next day, she ate more again.  Fast forward to today.  She would NOT take her bottle, but I could tell she was hungry.  She devoured it.  I have a cereal loving baby!

So, here's the deal.  She's eating again.  She's napping better.  She's having easier and more regular messy diapers.  And everyone else can judge, but I'm a believer!

And just for fun, here's some more pictures:

I gave up on pacifiers.  She now hates them, and is obsessed with her fists.

I asked Hod to watch #1 one morning so I could shower, and came back to this.  I think she is saying, "Kay, Mom, I watched Dad for you, but he was kind of boring."

Being a mom is pretty fun.

My Dreams Ate It

A new blog post that is.

Last night I was thinking, and I came up with this great, funny, insightful, warm-fuzzy blog post.  One of my last thoughts as I drifted off to sleep was: people are going to love this post, and think I'm the coolest!  (What, don't you ever think things like that?  Be honest... you know you do!)

But today... It's gone.  All I remember is the photo I was going to use.  I don't know if it was the waking up every 27 min from 3 AM to 8 AM that erased it, or if it was the awesome dream I had about my recently deceased friend... but it's gone.

Maybe next time friends.  Sorry you missed out.

(Ok, so maybe the post wouldn't have been as cool as I claimed.  But seeing as how you'll never see it, let's pretend it was AMAZING!)

The Bad Tipper

I have had many friends who have been waiters/waitresses.  They often told me the woes of the bad tipper, and I agreed with what they said.  For example, If you don't have the money for a tip, you probably shouldn't order a drink.  It's not your server's fault you're poor.  Don't punish them when they give you good service.  It makes sense.  I have always felt that a 15% tip was bare minimum.  (In other parts of the country you are supposed to leave at least 19%, but that's not the norm here yet.)

Then I married Hod.  He's picky.  If he doesn't like the service, he leaves a horrid tip!  This was very embarrassing to me.  There were times I would meet him in the car because I knew he was going to leave a bad tip.  However, when our server is good, he leaves a higher tip than I normally would.  There isn't much of a middle ground with him.

But... sometimes I think he has a point.  For example:  (Story time!)

I take a bunch of surveys online, and recently was able to earn a $25 dollar gift card for a restaurant. We found a baby sitter, and had a night on the town!  (Ok, not really, we're not that fancy.)  The Restaurant was kind of busy, and had a bar in it.  That's fine.  We ended up being seated near the bar.  Still ok, as it was a Thursday night and there weren't a lot of drinkers.  However... our waiter ended up being the bartender.  In between laughing and joking with the drinkers, he would come and serve us.  But we aren't as fun as the 3 guys sitting at the bar watching sports.  We were just a calm couple enjoying our time together.

The problem was, we could see (and hear) him chatting it up with the drinkers, and the other servers (And complaining about how much he hates his job and he has to work too much) instead of taking care of us.  We ordered our food, and never actually saw him at our table again.  There was a different person who brought us everything.  We pretty much never had anything to drink, and it was obvious he didn't care.  When tip time came... I knew it was going to be abysmal.  And for the first time, I wasn't embarrassed.  Yes, I feel bad that the hostess and bus boys were punished because of the poor tip we left.  It wasn't their fault.  (although the hostess did NOT want to be there either.)  I feel that when you go out to eat, half of the experience is the food, and half is the service.  And we only got the food.  (Which also wasn't very good.)  Since, we didn't receive service, we didn't really pay for the service.

Maybe I'm a bad person.  But, it was a little invigorating to not pay for something I didn't get!

Confession

Hi.

My name is Paily.  I'm a reality TV show junkie.

Seriously.  I just found out that The Amazing Race started again.  And I was happy.

The Amazing Race, Celebrity Apprentice, Survivor, Project Runway, The Biggest Loser, Dancing with the Stars, The Voice... They make me happy.

Maybe it's because I have given up all of my normal life for being a mom.  It's the new "normal life".  But I miss the past normal life.  So now I live vicariously through the TV.  Well... I guess my old normal never involved world travel, fund raising competitions, living on a stranded island, designing cloths, losing lots of weight (but maybe it should...), lots of dancing, (wait, yes it did!), and yes, I sing, so some of it was my old life.

I just love watching people.  I enjoy seeing how they react in different situations.  I think that is also why I love blogs so much.  I get to learn more about people.  I don't know if it's the Psych major in me or what, but I LOVE PEOPLE!!

The good news is: most of these shows air on different days.  That means I don't have to spend hours every day watching TV.  Well, and I watch them all online so I can put it off.

I should probably get out more.  But I love watching a show while #1 takes a nap.  Just taking a moment for a bite to eat, a bathroom break, and some people watching does me good.

Random, I know.  But I thought I would share.

What are some of your vices?

Cause It's Cute

Many of you have seen this picture.  But, I'm sharing it anyway.

I'm sure nothing says "Happy Valentine's Day" like baby feet posed like a heart.  (Actually, I didn't pose her, she did it.)

Have a great day!

Similarities

#1 loves taking a bath.  She loves to kick, and splash, and she loves getting her hair washed. I love what it does to her hair.  I think it is so great when she looks at me like this:

 

Although... I do have to admit... Even though the growth rate of her hair can't keep up with the growth rate of her head, sometimes that face reminds me of this:

found here

It makes me happy.

Living Through the Unexpected

Well, friends.  This has been a crazy week.  I've had a lot of time to think, reflect, pray, cry and change.  And even though it's been hard, I am grateful for the blessing that I have.

Last Monday, Hod had a rough day.  He's been through a lot in his life.  Things that have scarred him.  When I married him, I knew that he struggled with depression.  Soon after we settled into our first apartment he was diagnosed with PTSD.  We were unable to get him the help he needed for a while, and because of different events I now have Secondary-PTSD.  Last summer Hod and I were both put on antidepressants.  And life seemed to get better.

After a few months Hod was having a hard time again.  So the Dr upped his dose.  And life seemed to get better.

A few months later Hod was having a hard time again.  So the Dr. once again upped his dose.

But it just didn't seem to be working.

On Monday, he knew he was loosing control.  He couldn't stop the anger and rage, and the overwhelming hurt that was threatening to destroy him.  So he came to me, and asked me to call his sister and to take him to the hospital.  There he was checked in to the Adult Psychiatry unit.

Last week, I was a single mom, having to rely on loved ones to help take care of #1 so I could visit Hod.  I was allowed to call him 3 times a day for 10 min each, and see him for 90 minutes every evening.  Because he was a self-admit he was able to see #1 after the first 24 hours.

While there, we discovered that the medication he was on was wrong.  Apparently there are 2 common chemicals that go wrong in your brain if you have depression.  1 is the chemical that most people have wrong, and that is what his medication was treating.  The other is the chemical most likely to be messed up if you have fried your brains on drugs.  Hod has never done drugs.  However, while he was serving his mission for the Church he had some medical problems, the Dr's pumped him full of morphine, and then he discovered that he was allergic.  It actually messed up the chemicals in his brain.   So, all this time, he was on medicine that was giving him too much of one chemical, and not enough of the other.  This is why he would lose control.

And now, after a very hard week where I was driving back and forth (Oh, did I mention that the hospital Hod was in was 45 min away?) and trying to take care of things that were beyond what I thought my capabilities were, Hod is back home.  We are a family again.

#1 did really quite well with the crazy week.  She seems to have grown up a lot.  She is crying less (big shout of joy!) and she is actually learning to cope with her life.  In fact, today, for the first time, she put herself to sleep.  I hope she will keep that up!

Hod has since told me, that out of all of the married people in the hospital with him, he was the only one who had a supportive spouse.  He saw multiple divorce papers signed.  I just don't understand that.  Yes, life with Hod has been less than ideal, but how could I leave a man who was ill, when we hadn't ever gotten him the proper help?  I knew that even though it was so hard having him gone, that he could get better.  Having him away from me helped me to know how much I truly value him in my life.  Things aren't perfect yet, but I finally feel real hope that we can have a healthy relationship.

I am so very blessed to have Hod and #1.  They both have caused hardships in my life, and I'm sure I don't always make their life easier.  But, this morning, looking at Hod and #1 sleeping next to each other, I realized that I have the greatest blessing in the entire world.

I don't say this to brag.  I realize that sometimes I have been negative.  There have been times that I have complained about things that some of my loved ones would do anything to have.  I just want you all to know that I am really realizing that I have it pretty good.

*And as a random side note, Hod just went back to check on #1 while she naps.  She must be having a crazy dream, cause her arms are making her look like she is a Flamenco Dancer.  It's pretty great!*

My Happy Place

Days go by.  Some days are great, some days are hard.  But most days have at least one moment of this:

And then, for that moment, my day is wonderful.  

Cause my baby is CUTE!!

sometimes I just need to brag a little. :)